My boyfriend turns 23

August 18, 2010

One year has passed. And I am doing this again.

Last year (read it here), I baked a cuppycake, counted down with him, sang him a birthday song, blew the candle out for him and at the same time made a wish for him. Secretly.

I wished that 19 August the following year, he would be counting down, singing songs and blowing candles with his girlfriend. I promised (and cried bucketloads of tears at the same time) that I would wish him well and that I could eventually move on once I knew he was well taken care of.

I swore upon all the deities up there that I would not re-enter the cycle. I would never bake him another cake or drop another tear. Everything would end with him starting a new year.

This year, I am the girlfriend. The one I prayed he would find last year. What a strange twist in events. So to complete the wish made 365 days ago, the cuppycakes are baked, decorated and waiting for him to come home.


They are not very pretty.

I blame my indecisiveness for letting this drag so long it became a habit. I blame my moment of weakness for not asking why he took me back, perhaps I was worried his answer was not one I wanted to hear. And I can only hope with every fibre of my being, that I will not hurt, again.

Sigh, today has just been a lousy day.


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